I Was the White Lotus Stand-In

I Was the White Lotus Stand-In cover

I Was the White Lotus Stand-In

Table of Contents
"The Whole Aetheria Are My Senior’s Sycophants" — Completed — Turns out I was only a stand-in for the pure white moonlight that all the Aether Lords adored.

But they only knew I could be a substitute; they didn’t know I could be cold-blooded too.

1. "Claire, it’s your good fortune that your heart can be given to Hazel."

When the Silencer Blade slid into my chest, everything at last clicked into place.

I didn’t even realize when my tears started falling. I didn’t want to cry, really—I just couldn’t help it. The Silencer Blade hurt like hell. I wanted so badly to lift my hand and pull it out, but I knew that was a delusion—before me stood a handsome Divine Lord with his eyes lowered, expressionless.

His black hair was swept high, eyes like rolling waves, lips the color of cherries. He wore a blaze of red, and the whole man was so clear it felt like morning dew.

Clean face, clean red robe—only his hands were stained with blood. My blood.

The ground was cold. The Silencer Blade sank a few more inches into my heart.

Beside him stood two other Aether Lords, equally noble.

Both in white; one wore a cool, detached expression, the other looked pained. Both were striking.

The pained one looked at me, then at the man in red, hesitated, and said, “Dominic, we should finish this quickly…”

The cool-faced Aether Lord frowned slightly at that, glancing at the other. “Evan, you’re being soft.”

Evan sighed helplessly. “Marcus, she has been our little junior apprentice for three hundred years.”

“If not for Hazel, would she even deserve it?”

Marcus looked at me; something flickered in his eyes as he said coldly, “We finally found a heart that suits Hazel perfectly. We can’t afford even the smallest mistake. Dominic, be careful when you take it.”

Hazel, Hazel… the name had floated past my ears before, but not often.

Still, in Aetheria I’d overheard attendants whispering about this Aether Lord’s romantic exploits.

Once, by accident, I’d wandered into a forbidden glade. In a pool thick with precious spirit essences, a Moonlit Lotus had been sleeping quietly.

The one time I intruded, Master Rowan—who had always been gentle with me—had exploded in anger for the first time.

I should have realized then: that lotus, so strikingly like my original self, would someday push me back into the abyss.

I’m not an innocent Aether Lord. From the moment I grew conscious, I crawled through the deadliest places of the Three Realms—Ravenmoor Marsh—to strengthen myself.

I’ve killed monsters. My hands have been stained. I’m not the delicate, poised “Hazel” the attendants gossiped about.

Even so, when Adrian descended from the sky—

White like moonlight, a face that outshone mountains and rivers, one thought of his and the great beast who meant to kill me turned to ash—my heart, for the first time in my life, had burned.

He used divine power to soothe my wounds, his long fingers wiped blood from my face, and with a voice I’d never heard—gentle and lovely—he said, “From now on, I will protect you. Do not be afraid.”

“From now on, just call me Master.”

That sentence echoed through my dreams and nightmares so many times afterward; it was a sound that kept me breathing.

Later I became Master Rowan’s favored little disciple—Claire Bennett—envied and fussed over by the two powerful senior brothers, Marcus and Evan.

Later still, when I descended to the mortal realm, I found an abandoned infant and named him Oliver. I raised him with my own hands.

He didn’t disappoint me. By two hundred years old he had ascended into an Aether Lord—born with divine bones and remarkable presence.

But it turned out Oliver truly was long-lived; he wasn’t a discarded mortal infant at all. From birth he could have held the rank of Divine Lord—he was Dominic Reed.

Claire, Claire.

Not only did my original self resemble Hazel, my face matched seven-tenths of hers. Perhaps when Master Rowan chose my cultivation name, he thought it a blessing—something to be envied.

So today, as Hazel prepared to take human form and reclaim her Aether seat, they decided this substitute—me—must be sacrificed for her perfection.

My most trusted Master sealed the path to the lower realms. My two senior brothers personally hunted me. The boy I raised, the one I called Oliver, drove the Silencer Blade into my chest with his own hands.

For Hazel.

My heart finally slipped free of this body.

Immortals don’t truly die, but when the heart leaves, all my Aether strength and every emotion will vanish into nothing.

Those powers and feelings will be given to Hazel, so that upon forming a body she’ll grow stronger and, under the surge of these intense emotions, recall her past.

So they thought: losing four hundred years’ worth of cultivation and normal feelings yet still surviving—that should be a mercy to me.

But when the heart left, my pain did not lessen at all.

I had worked my whole life for four centuries to build my cultivation. I had seen every love and hatred this world produces. Why—why, for Hazel’s flawless rebirth, should I give up everything?

So I used every last bit of Aether power, every secret weapon I’d hidden away.

My feelings remained.

It was the final thing I had left.

In that heart, besides four hundred years’ cultivation, there was nothing else.

I lay on the ground, feeling the empty hollow where my heart had been, and forced a smile.

They’d be delighted when they saw Hazel reborn with no memory of the past, just as I imagined.

Fortunately, the man in red didn’t inspect the living heart I’d given them. The surprise I’d planted wouldn’t be revealed now—though I didn’t know why—perhaps that was for the best.

He handed the heart to my eldest senior, Marcus. Marcus glanced down at me and, rare as it was, showed a small smile. Cradling the heart, he said, “Claire, it’s your fortune that your heart can go to Hazel.”

Evan’s face, which had been soft with reluctance, brightened at the sight of the heart. Thinking of Hazel’s impending return, he gave a radiant smile. “Claire, Hazel will be back. She’s gentle and kind—don’t blame us. From now on, let’s get along. You were rebellious today, and Master Rowan is upset, but if you behave, I’ll have Hazel put in a good word for you. Master will calm down.”

With that he left without looking back, walking away with Marcus who cradled the heart anxiously.

Only one Divine Lord remained.

Through my blurred vision, the man in red slowly bent down. He seemed to be looking at me. I felt sick; I forced my eyes open so the burning, intense disgust in them would be unmistakable.

Dominic saw it clearly.

On his impassive face he lowered his gaze, and when he raised it again, there was a deep, heavy color in his eyes. He reached out his finger as if to touch my eye. I did not turn away; I watched him quietly.

His fingertip brushed my eye—it was cold.

Like a sigh, he said softly, “Sister, why are you trying to run?”

I couldn’t speak. Without a heart or Aether power, I was as weak as a newborn sprig of some lowly spirit.

“Sister, don’t look at me like that. I don’t like it.”

When I stayed silent, Dominic was quiet for a moment before covering my eyes with his palm.

New, excruciating pain flared—but I had no heart.

—My eyes were gone.

2. “Sister, can I take your memory away? Will you let me?”

The day I perfected divine bones and descended to the mortal realm, I found the abandoned Oliver.

He was Dominic Reed in disguise—Divine Lord by nature.

I didn’t know then.

Compassion rose in me anyway. I wasn’t as kind as people thought, but perhaps a guard I’d kept for centuries had finally grown thin. When I poked the infant’s cheek and he didn’t cry—just softly grasped my finger—his skin warm and pliant—I decided to bring him to Aetheria.

Only after we returned did I discover the abandoned infant had divine bones.

When I mentioned it to Evan, his eyes flickered. He looked at the child in my arms and laughed, “Of course it’s you, Claire—this one you pick up is gifted with divine bones.”

It wasn’t until they chased me, blood dripping down my cheek, staining my white robe, that I understood.

There was no “picking up at random,” no accidental discovery of “divine bones.” To get close to me—the supposed Hazel stand-in—the highborn little Divine Lord had pretended to be an abandoned infant.

So all those coincidences and shared moments were fake. They were contrived by that high lord to reach me—the supposed Hazel substitute.

Marcus had never liked Oliver—even then. He often competed with Evan for my favor and showed no fondness when Oliver grew day by day. But he never treated Oliver cruelly like he sometimes teased Evan—perhaps because he already suspected Oliver’s true identity.

I remember Oliver’s first time standing, his first steps.

He spoke early—his first word was “Sister.”

Thinking back, how delighted I had been.

My early memories were of the fathomless, deadly Ravenmoor Marsh.

So when I found Oliver, I only wished him a clean, safe upbringing. I named him Oliver with careful hands, every stitch of attention soaked in the self-mockery and pain of my own gouged-out heart.

Master Rowan—the one who found me, raised me to divine bones and guided me into Aetheria—was distinctly displeased with Oliver.

Now I think he disliked not Oliver’s closeness to Claire, but Dominic’s insistence on Hazel.

Adrian.

I had loved him.

A god like light in the dark pulled me out and sheltered me with tenderness and care.

How could I not have loved him?

Days after my eyes were gouged out—countless days—I was perhaps taken somewhere by Dominic. He shackled me with chains that even Aether Lords couldn’t break. He would come several times a day but never spoke. He would only stand quietly in front of me.

Finally, he seemed unable to contain himself. His breath swept around me like a breeze. His voice was low: “Sister, why won’t you speak?”

My hands were bound by chains. Surrounded by endless dark, I said nothing.

In truth, I didn’t know what to say.

My heart and my eyes had been taken. I didn’t know what good imprisoning me would do for him—or for Hazel.

“Sister, even if your heart left, you still did something bad.”

Dominic didn’t wait for a reply. In that soft voice there was a thread of anger, as if he wanted to laugh. “Did you make it so Hazel doesn’t regain her memories?”

I smiled a little. For the current me, this was the easiest thing in the world.

"No memory… that’s a good thing."

It was the first thing I’d said in days.

Darkness pressed in, then a long silence followed.

If not for the familiar scent of Dominic Reed, knowing he was still standing in front of me, that silence would have felt like I was completely alone again.

How long passed before a sound came, I couldn’t say. When a cold fingertip brushed my cheek, I shuddered backward.

But the owner of those hands wouldn’t let me. His voice sounded near my ear again, breath warm and close against my earlobe, and I felt a wave of nausea.

"Sis, what if I take your memories away? Would that be okay?"

He didn’t give me a chance to answer. Something appeared in his hand, and then he pried my mouth open, trying to shove it in.

When the pill touched my lips I knew what it was—the Lethe Draught from the underworld mixed with Wraithroot from Ravenmoor Marsh.

Those two did indeed make people forget their pasts.

I didn’t resist. I obediently swallowed the pill.

Dominic paused, stunned by my compliance. His fingers rested on my lips and his voice wavered, "How—how could you swallow it?"

I let out a small, bitter laugh. "As you wished, Divine Lord."

"Sis, how can you swallow it?"

Dominic’s fingers dug into my throat as he shouted, "Sis, spit it out—sis—"

"Sis, how could you want to forget me? Sis?"

"Longshan will be terrified, sis, please spit it out?"

"Sis—"

He even used Aetheric power.

It didn’t help.

Faintly, I thought I heard a familiar voice—gentle, but icy—"Dominic, what did you give Claire?"

But under the drug’s influence, the voices faded. In the haze I was back at the first time Dominic stood and fell; he struggled up, tearful, crashing into my arms and whispering, "Sis, Longshan is scared."

Or it was the first time I saw Adrian Hale—white robes spotless—offering his hand to the darkened me, saying, "From now on, I’ll protect you. You don’t need to be afraid anymore."

3. "He seemed to flee in panic."

I woke under the push of a powerful Aetheric force.

It was a pleasant power—gentle and steady.

Supported by it, I opened my eyes a little, but darkness still hid everything. I moved a finger and realized I was bound by chains.

They were cold, and I could feel these chains were extraordinarily strong—far beyond my ability to break.

Then the warmth in my body stopped.

And there was a flutter of uncertainty.

"…Who?"

My voice came out hoarse and strained as I tried to speak.

No reply.

Still, I could clearly sense someone in front of me—an aura like the power that had warmed me: calm as water but aloof.

I tilted my head to get a better view and croaked, "Who are you?"

The moment the words left my throat, that presence vanished.

—As if running away in a panic.

Adrian had no idea why he’d fled, and he looked a little embarrassed about it.

After walking away from Dominic’s sanctuary, he noticed his fingers trembled slightly.

He stood quietly outside Dominic’s temple. From a distance, white-robed figures drifted like clouds, shrouding the handsome Divine Lord in mist.

No one or nothing seemed to pierce those smoke-light eyes. To everyone in Aetheria, Adrian Hale—one of the three Divine Lords—was forever lofty and unapproachable.

Yet in the raven-black of his hair, thin threads of crimson were tangled—eight small red filaments wound among his dark locks like sudden red stars across the night.

He just stood there, silent.

Passing immortals dared not look directly at him; they offered distant bows and hurried on.

That frozen atmosphere held until a melodious voice called, "Adrian Hale."

Her brows were like distant hills, her eyes soft as if the world around her were gentle. Her moonlit-white gown was as pristine as the purest blossom, and as she walked, cloud-like patterns seemed to swirl subtly.

Everything about her was undeniably beautiful, but more than beauty was the profoundly soothing aura that radiated from her.

Seeing her, Adrian’s furrowed brow eased and a faint smile opened on his face. "Hazel, what brings you here?"

Hazel Everett smiled back, lips pressed gently together. "Lord Marcus and Lord Evan were fighting… I thought a walk might help."

Attendants carrying divine flowers and fruits drifted by and kept dropping glances at the pair, whispering among themselves—"Is that Hazel Everett?"

"Of course. When have you ever seen Adrian smile like that for anyone else?"

"That Claire—"

An attendant hurriedly cut herself off. "How dare you speak of her? Have you forgotten that scene?"

They whispered as they hurried away.

New attendants perhaps, unaware that Adrian and Hazel had heard every word.

Hazel’s expression clouded slightly. This wasn’t the first time she’d heard the name Claire.

She’d overheard it during Marcus and Evan’s fight. And sometimes Dominic, who lingered around her, would unconsciously mutter the name.

Claire… who was she?

A flutter in Hazel’s chest made her want to ask Adrian. At that moment, she realized Adrian knew this person too—because when she looked up, she found Adrian staring not at her, but through her, toward someone else.

"Adrian?"

Hazel frowned, panic rising.

Adrian blinked and offered an apologetic smile. "Sorry, I was thinking… about some affairs of Aetheria. You’re newly ascended—your cultivation is still unstable. Let’s head back."

He reached out and, in a practiced gesture, ruffled Hazel’s hair. The smile froze on his face as if he’d suddenly realized what he’d done, and he hastily withdrew his hand. "Sorry, Hazel."

Hazel smiled gently. "It’s nothing. You used to do that a lot, didn’t you?"

Adrian was quiet for a moment, then moved his fingers and murmured, "…Yes."

Hazel wasn’t Claire. She was kinder, gentler, more considerate… and she didn’t have those deceptively mild eyes that hid a fierce streak.

After more darkness and silence, footsteps approached.

Unlike the warm power that woke me before, this presence burned—hot and fierce, like fire, like the sun.

The heat wrapped around me all at once.

Its owner hugged me tight, crushing me as if trying to fold me into his chest; I could barely breathe.

In the tense quiet I heard a young voice whisper, "Sis, was he here? Was he?"

4. "Which brother would do this to his sister?"

I hadn’t even answered when the voice murmured in my ear, "Sis, you smell like him. I don’t like it."

The stream of words poured into my ear as if pent up for a long time, now finally unleashed.

"Sis, you fainted that day. You frightened Longshan."

"And that Adrian—how dare he come here."

The tone dropped, thick with displeasure and restraint.

Adrian?

I turned my head slightly. His breath hot against my ear made me restless. I repeated the name, "Adrian?"

He froze.

I felt like I’d said something forbidden. My brow knit.

Then a surge of Aetheric force swept the area. Heat rose, like an oven, and the pressure slammed me back against the wall.

It was an ice-like wall that chilled my spine as I was pinned. The man in front of me held me so tight my chained hands were forced against the stone; his fingers locked my wrists. Heat radiated close enough to scorch.

I frowned. "Let go."

The fingers on my wrist traced slowly back and forth. I could feel his burning gaze travel over me. I turned my head a little and suddenly he clamped a hand on my throat. His voice, both soft and forceful, grew: "Sis—"

A ripping sound—

I hadn’t expected it.

Just as he tightened and nearly stole my breath, he suddenly released me. But at the same time my clothes were torn open.

His cool fingers grazed the revealed skin, touching again and again.

The nearer his searing heat came, the more sweat pricked at my neck.

Soft black hair brushed my cheek as he almost buried himself against me; his hot lips skimmed my neck and shoulder.

Anger and disgust shook me to the core. I couldn’t hold back. I blurted, "Who are you? Why are you doing this to me?"

His lips paused on my shoulder.

Coldly, he answered, "What are you talking about, sis?"

"You call me sis and yet do these vile things."

I felt his movements stop, followed by a dry laugh. "And I’m alone—what family could I have? Who are you?"

Silence hung.

When he spoke again, his voice trembled, "Sis… you’re lying to me, aren’t you?"

I heard him pacing. His aura was unsteady; his words came in fits. "What? Adrian and I both used Aetheric power—how could you forget? Lethe Draught and Wraithroot—how could—"

He rushed over, trembling as he buried me in his arms. "Sister, you’re lying to me, aren’t you? How could you forget Longsheng?"

I said coldly, "The Lethe Draught and Wraithroot? I grew up in Ravenmoor Marsh—how could those things possibly work on me? I really didn’t think—I’d merely dozed, and when I woke…"

I paused, gave a bitter little smile. "My heart was gone, my eyes were blind, and this… this body now has immortal bones I don’t recognize. Who are you, exactly? What are you scheming, locking me up here?"

"Ravenmoor Marsh…" He didn’t let go of me. "Could it be… could it be that you only forgot the last three hundred years?"

His voice brightened with relief. "You forgot—forgot—"

But then, for reasons I couldn’t tell, he started to sob painfully. "Why… why was the first person you saw when you woke him? Why could you just forget everything like that? What about me? Sister, what am I supposed to do? How can you forget Longsheng?"

I was quiet for a moment. "I don’t know you."

The one calling himself Longsheng—acting like some lofty Divine Lord—held me tight and said softly, "It’s okay, it’s okay, sister. Longsheng will stay with you. Sister, I raised you with my own hands. We’re the closest people in the world."

I pursed my lips and couldn’t help smiling. "You raised me with your own hands? Judging by your tone, you must be a Divine Lord, someone from Aetheria. I’m only the most ordinary lotus spirit in the Lower Realm—how could I have raised you myself? Besides…" I glanced down.

My torn clothing mocked me with its ridiculousness. "What brother would do something like this to his sister?"

"Marcus, you are nothing." The words had barely fallen when I noticed the Divine Lord’s body go stiff.

He rose slowly, as if nothing had happened, and said softly, "Sister, I’m sorry. It was all Longsheng’s fault."

"Longsheng was too hasty. Longsheng feared that you would be harmed by that person." He murmured, "Sister, I cherish you so much."

I frowned. "What are you saying?"

"Sister, you don’t know. Your heart was taken by Adrian, your eyes were taken by Adrian. He imprisoned you here and bound your hands and feet with chains that lock away immortality." The young Divine Lord’s voice carried a trace of sorrow, echoing in the tiny room like a devil’s whisper in the black. "Sister, I searched so hard to find you. You don’t know how terrified I was—terrified you’d leave me. But I never expected Adrian to give you the Lethe Draught and Wraithroot. Even though I used divine power, I failed… you still forgot everything from these years."

"Are you saying the one who gave me immortal power was Adrian?" I was silent a moment. "Why should I believe any of this?"

"I know you’ll doubt me." The young Divine Lord gently took my hand and smiled. "But don’t worry, sister. Before long I’ll get your heart and eyes back."

He coughed suddenly, and something wet hit the back of my hand—probably blood. Feeling the sticky warmth, I couldn’t help frowning. "What’s wrong with you?"

He forced a lively tone. "I’m fine, sister. Just a little blood. I was injured protecting you when Adrian chased you that day, but it’s nothing—just minor wounds."

I drew my hand back. "Then tell me—what’s your relationship with Adrian? Why would he rip out my heart and steal my eyes and lock me here?"

The Divine Lord in red lowered his gaze. He looked at the disheveled white-dressed woman leaning against the wall and let a faint smile lift his mouth, though his tone turned heavy with sorrow. "Sister, Adrian is your master. But he did you no kindness. At first he taught you seriously, but after you advanced to an Aether Lord, not only Adrian but your two former senior disciples believed that you were merely a flower spirit by birth—yet you had such outstanding talent. So they all conspired and did this to you."

He bent down and touched the torn clothing; the rips mended as if by magic. He straightened the collar and said slowly, "But don’t worry, sister. Longsheng will always protect you."

At that moment a soft voice floated in, like it came through some kind of transmitter—"Divine Lord, are you busy?" A gentle, mild female voice.

The Divine Lord glanced instinctively toward the sound. I heard it too and reminded him quietly, "Someone seems to be calling for you."

"Sorry, sister, I have something I must handle. But don’t worry, I’ll sneak back to see you." There was no panic in the young Divine Lord at all. He removed his hand from my collar and smiled lightly.

The warm breath that had filled the space slowly faded away. The room grew cold again. I closed my eyes and moved the wrist that was held by the chain, and found myself smiling a little.

—In the serene Willowbrook Garden, leaves and blossoms swayed in the breeze. A still pond in the center rippled gently.

The woman standing in the pavilion at the heart of the pond with two handsome Aether Lords should have been a pleasant sight. Instead, two different colors of light flashed through the space, and within them two figures darted, crossed, and collided—each clash flinging petals to the ground and even shifting the color of the sky.

"Marcus, why must you cling to Hazel? Don’t you think you’re being too possessive?"

"…Evan, I’ve told you—don’t meet Hazel in secret. How dare you disobey our senior’s orders?"

"This is nonsense!"

This wasn’t the first time Marcus and Evan had fought. Since Hazel had awakened, quarrels and skirmishes like this happened nearly every day.

Hazel, dressed in white, stood below with helpless furrowed brows. "Marcus, Evan, stop fighting."

At that moment a streak of fiery red light shot between the two sparring Aether Lords. "If you’re done, stop." A figure approached—black hair standing slightly up, robes like burning embers, moving with unmistakable charisma. His eyes were cool and sharp like bamboo; although young-looking, he carried an unspoken authority.

Evan immediately backed off, glancing at the red-clad figure. "Marcus, Dominic is here. How can you still strike?"

Marcus lowered his hands and sneered coldly at the red-clad newcomer, a look of hatred crossing his face. Then he said, "Since Dominic’s arrived, how could a lowly Aether Lord like me still act up?"

He paused, staring at Hazel as she hurried closer, then, loud enough for her to hear, added meaningfully, "Dominic seems in a hurry—did he come from that direction?"

He knew where Claire had gone after that day. Hazel had just reached them and frowned when she heard Marcus’s words, about to speak, when—

Smack—

Marcus was struck hard and sent tumbling into the pond nearby.

Silence fell. Water splashed and ripples spread; Marcus, drenched, slowly rose.

He looked up at the Divine Lord, hands behind his back. Dominic watched him expressionless, then smiled thinly. "Marcus, you are nothing."

"He has… innate immortal bones." Over two hundred years ago, Adrian’s young disciple Claire became an Aether Lord after only a hundred years. On the day she ascended, Claire stood pale and radiant in a simple moonlit white gown, surrounded by dazzling light and the sound of immortal beasts. For a moment, Marcus thought the woman he’d pined for for centuries had appeared before him.

But soon Marcus realized the truth. Claire’s eyes always had a hint of wariness toward others. Her features, seventy percent like Hazel’s, should have been soft and gentle—but they carried the chill of ice. Unlike Hazel, Claire rarely smiled. One thing was similar—Marcus saw a small, involuntary smile bloom on the moonlit-gowned woman when she saw Adrian approaching, and he thought, "That smile when facing Adrian."

Marcus’s expression darkened. He closed his eyes and looked at the brilliant scene again, then toward the forbidden direction of Aetheria, and allowed a small smile. "No matter. Since Claire has become an Aether Lord, Hazel’s return can’t be far."

The moonlit-gowned Claire walked toward Marcus and Evan and inclined her head. "Marcus senior, Evan senior."

Evan’s excitement showed openly; he practically danced around her. "Claire, I told you you’d succeed, didn’t I?"

"Thank you for your guidance, senior." Claire offered a faint smile.

Marcus swallowed his rage and softened his voice. "Claire, now that you’ve become an Aether Lord, what would you like to do next? If there’s anything you like or want, tell me—your senior will get it for you."

Claire frowned slightly, considered, and said, "I’ll keep cultivating. Maybe I’ll visit the Lower Realm. Aetheria’s a bit stifling." She shook her head. "You’ve already given me so much, senior. I don’t deserve it."

"How could that be? You’re my most cherished junior." Marcus smiled and ruffled Claire’s hair. "Then how about I accompany you to the Lower Realm?"

Evan, annoyed, slapped Marcus’s hand away from Claire and grinned. "Marcus has been assigned to handle matters in the Eastern Sea and is very busy. Junior, let me go with you. I go to the Lower Realm often; I know lots of fun places and good food."

As a descendant of the Eastern Sea dragon clan and a disciple under Adrian, Marcus had a bright future. The Heavenly Emperor had recently put him in charge of Eastern Sea affairs.

Marcus glanced at his hand. Claire had politely refused. "There’s no need, senior. I can go alone."

As they were speaking, a figure slowly came to a stop beside her. He tilted his head toward her and his voice was smooth as polished jade. "Claire, you’ve only recently reached Aether Lord. Your divine power is still unstable. I’ll help you stabilize your base—we’ll ensure it’s safe before you return to the mortal realm."

The speaker was none other than their Master Rowan.

He patted Claire’s head on instinct. Claire lifted her face at his words and, as if surprised at herself, bloomed into a naive, joyful smile. "I understand, Master."

Marcus watched the warm scene with a cold smile.

—Claire had returned to Aetheria, bringing a baby with her. Marcus hadn’t expected that.

He was already closing in on the baby, gathering divine force to act, when he felt a familiar power—a scalding, searing heat—pressing down.

From not far off came the rumble of a dragon carriage, a warning of sorts.

It was Dominic Reed.

Marcus stopped himself and exchanged a look with Evan Carter, who clearly had noticed as well.

Claire’s voice carried a thread of delight. "Senior, I met him in the mortal realm and felt a connection, so I brought him along. He’s still so small… I named him Oliver. What do you all think?"

Marcus’ face was composed. He sized up the infant sleeping in Claire’s arms, and then forced a matching expression of delight. "Little junior sister, haven’t you seen his innate talent? He is… born with an immortal essence."

Evan laughed softly at the side, eyes layered with meaning. "As expected of Claire. She just picks someone up and it’s a promising child with immortal essence."

Claire paused at their words. She lowered her head, lightly touching the baby’s cheek, and said slowly, "I didn’t take notice of that. If he rises to become an Aether Lord someday, that would be good. If not, it’s fine too. The world has so many shapes—may he cherish them all, and take them lightly."

And so, over the next two hundred years, Marcus watched that infant grow.

Maybe because Dominic forced himself back to his true, austere nature, the divine power hidden in that small body—the immense force of a Divine Lord—meant Oliver suffered illness and calamity as a child.

Many nights Marcus saw Claire cradling Oliver as she went between the Healing Hall and other places, or standing on the lake pavilion in Willowbrook Garden, conjuring little firefly lights to amuse the ailing child.

Dominic’s memories only returned after he ascended to Aether Lord.

By then Claire was gently holding him. "Oliver, congratulations."

Marcus saw with his own eyes the bright, bamboo-straight youth shift; the light curl of his lips fell away, while the hands that held the figure before him tightened.

"Thank you… sister."

Marcus watched coldly.

Not long after that day, a tremor ran through the forbidden grounds of Aetheria. He rushed over in elation and saw the Moonlit Lotus in the pool quietly bloom—Hazel was returning too.

—In the hush that followed, Marcus and the Divine Lord with folded arms exchanged a look from across the way.

Soaked and disheveled, Marcus suddenly smiled and gave a deep bow. His voice was even. "Dominic, forgive me—Marcus misspoke."

The young Divine Lord in red watched Marcus without expression. Tension spiked.

Evan stood like an onlooker, silent, taking it all in.

Hazel glanced at the dripping Marcus and then at Dominic, worry creasing her features. "Dominic, I don’t think Marcus meant to offend you. Please don’t take it to heart."

At Hazel’s words Dominic’s face softened and his features grew gentler. He gave Hazel a smile. "If Hazel sister speaks, I won’t be angry. But…"

He smiled on and continued, "Some people still need to recognize their place, Marcus. Don’t you agree?"

As one of the three Divine Lords, Dominic had both the standing and the right to say that.

Marcus smiled faintly. He didn’t bother using his power to dry his clothes; still wet, he stepped out of the water and said, "What the Divine Lord says is correct."

Hazel’s worry didn’t ease. Before she could say more, dizziness swept over her. Her mouth opened, then closed; her eyes fluttered shut as she fainted.

Dominic caught her. Marcus had just rushed forward, but seeing Dominic holding Hazel, his outstretched hand fell back.

Evan cried out anxiously, "What’s wrong with Hazel? Why did she suddenly collapse?"

Dominic held Hazel, brows knit. "I’ll take Hazel back to the Luminous Hall. Evan, you go to the Healing Hall."

The Luminous Hall was Master Rowan’s residence; Hazel had been recuperating there. Before Evan could reply Dominic’s figure vanished.

Marcus followed without another word. Evan sighed and hurried to the Healing Hall.

—Inside the Luminous Hall.

The summoned healer from the Healing Hall stroked a nonexistent beard and looked slowly at the pained Hazel lying in bed. "This… the power inside Hazel probably isn’t hers. Though the form is similar, it’s not actually her own."

Dominic watched Hazel in silence.

Marcus spoke coldly. "So?"

The healer continued at an unhurried pace. "Hazel’s true form is a lotus. One crucial seed—her lotus heart—becomes her heart when she transforms. Two other seeds form her eyes; the rest become other organs, and the remaining lotus platform becomes her life artifact. Four hundred years ago Hazel destroyed her original body; she should have died. Yet, aided by the Divine Lords and others, someone found a lotus heart similar to hers and inserted it, allowing Hazel to take form again."

The healer was unfazed by Marcus’ harshness, and when he said, "someone found…" he couldn’t help smiling. "But that lotus heart isn’t Hazel’s. It’s inside her, but it’s rejected by the other seeds. That’s why Hazel fainted."

At that moment Master Rowan entered. He’d been handling affairs and felt the change in the connection he’d placed on Hazel; he hurried over. Hearing the healer’s words, the worry that had creased his brow stiffened into something more fixed.

"Master Rowan."

The three Aether Lords bowed.

He looked at Hazel’s pained face and asked the healer, "If what you say is true, what can be done?"

"I’m no lotus; how could I reconcile seeds?" The healer waved his hand and rose, shrugging. He shook his head and said, "I don’t know why, but the moment I stepped into this hall I felt nauseous—couldn’t stay. Master Rowan, Dominic, I’m off." He glanced at Dominic with a smile. "I’ll go read my stories. There’s a line—’an ungrateful white-eyed wolf’—so pathetic and amusing."

Before anyone could respond, the healer bowed, picked up his box, and vanished in a cloud.

Dominic’s expression darkened further—he knew the healer was speaking obliquely. He’d been sick so often as a child that Hazel took him to the Healing Hall; they were old acquaintances.

Master Rowan knew too. For some reason, he felt a peculiar relief at the healer’s words.

Marcus clenched his fists, thinking only of Hazel. He turned to Dominic. "You heard that. If Hazel lacks a seed…"

Evan’s eyes widened at his implication. He frowned. "You mean you want one from Claire…?"

"Claire is already as she is. How could we remove her seed now?" Master Rowan interrupted sharply.

He seemed to realize what he’d said and attempted to bury the awkwardness. "Marcus, Claire is also your junior."

Marcus sneered inwardly at their master and turned back to the silent Dominic. "Dominic, I know you took Claire’s eyes. Two lotus seeds. Hazel will be fine."

Evan had not known about this until Marcus spoke. A chill ran through him recalling the healer’s departing remark. Dominic had taken Claire’s eyes not to give them away—he couldn’t stand seeing the disdain in those eyes. He had never intended to hand them to anyone.

Dominic looked down at Hazel, her face drawn in pain, sweat beading on her brow.

It was as if he were looking back at his sister from that day.

He closed his eyes. In that instant, memories of Hazel throwing herself before him during his tribulation returned. Claire’s face overlapped with Hazel’s again and again. Dominic’s emotions churned; he felt bile at his throat and suddenly spat blood.

"Divine Lord…"

Evan rushed forward to support him.

Master Rowan’s brow tightened, but Marcus continued. "Dominic, be honest. Hazel risked everything to shield you. Have you forgotten?"

His voice was icy, cutting.

Master Rowan finally spoke. "Marcus, enough."

Marcus fell silent—Master Rowan was his teacher. He couldn’t argue. He watched Hazel with an aching discontent.

Dominic straightened slowly and wiped the blood from his lips. On his palm, two jet-black, lustrous beads rose like ink-pearls, radiating a gentle, opalescent light.

Marcus’ eyes lit. "You intend to—"

Before he could finish, an overwhelming divine force slammed him to the ground.

Dust hung in the air. Silence swallowed the hall.

Master Rowan wanted to speak, but his gaze on those two beads drifted to that pair of beautiful, defiant eyes—Claire’s eyes—the small junior who always smiled softly at him. A sudden pain bloomed in his chest, a pain he’d carried for over two hundred years. He didn’t know why it still hurt.

He, one of the three high Aether Lords, who should be beyond harm—felt it anyway.

"This is the last time."

Silence filled the hall, broken only by the faint voice of the young Divine Lord.

Darkness I had already learned to live with.

But for some reason—whether from my body or from the depths of my soul—pain and a tearing ache began to spread through me.

I tried to press my hand to where it hurt, but chains bound my wrists tight.

In that stillness sweat poured down my face. I must have looked a mess, but I didn’t care. I hurt so badly I wanted to stand. The last traces of spirit-sense within me flared and skittered, then were gone.

What had vanished?

I tried to open my eyes; only blackness met me.

And the cold clink of the iron chains.

8. “Oliver, you won’t let your sister down, will you?”

In the midst of that sharp, spreading pain, I knew I might never see again.

A bead of sweat from my temple fell onto my lips.

It tasted bitter.

When the warm air brushed my face, the Divine Lord who called himself “Oliver” was quiet for a long moment.

Then I felt his hand reach toward me.

I turned my head on instinct—just that tiny motion stole my breath in several ragged gasps.

“Sis, I just wanted to wipe your sweat.”

His voice was soft.

I was silent a long while before I said, “You said you’d help me take back my heart and my eyes.”

He didn’t answer.

He seemed to stoop, taking a corner of a cloth to gently dab the sweat from my face.

He murmured, “Sister, will you leave me?”

It sounded less like a question to me and more like he was asking himself.

“How could I ever leave you like this?”

I managed a bitter little laugh. “You said I raised you, remember?”

Oliver’s voice floated in that small space. “Yes. Sister—two hundred years.”

I smiled faintly. The chained hand swung toward him a little. “Come here.”

After a long moment, footsteps drew closer.

I reached out and found the cool plane of his face.

His lips trembled; his voice did, too.

“Sis….”

Oliver’s murmured syllables were vague.

A drop of something landed on the back of my hand.

Tear.

I leaned in closer and tugged at the corner of my mouth, trying to force a smile and failing.

So close to his lips I whispered, “Oliver, how could you fall for the sister who raised you?”

“Oliver, you wouldn’t betray the woman who raised you for two hundred years, would you?”

“…”

He shuddered violently at that and nearly stumbled back a step.

Where I could not see, Dominic touched the blood at the corner of his mouth with a fingertip. He looked down at his long finger, at the mark there, then glanced at his palm.

He remembered the day he had gouged Claire’s heart—her blood had stained his fingers like this too.

He trembled and covered his eyes to hold the tears back.

Something inside him, like a thunderstorm, shook and beat at his throat, leaving it raw.

But he couldn’t let her go. He absolutely could not lose her.

He wouldn’t allow her to love anyone else.

But he also didn’t want her to hate him.

In the long silence of that space I rattled my chains. “You say it was Adrian who imprisoned me here. Now I have no heart and no eyes—”

I chuckled softly. “My eyes have likely been taken too. If that’s the case, I’m nothing but a cripple. What more can I cling to? Tell him to let me out for a walk. I don’t like being alone in here.”

Oliver didn’t answer at first, but he stepped closer and touched the icy chain and the hand it bound.

My fingers twitched and then, almost of their own accord, closed around his trembling fingertip.

Feeling the tremor in his hand, I softened my voice. “Oliver, will you?”

“I’ve cared for you two hundred years. Oliver—you won’t let me down, will you?”

Through the heat at my face I heard the boy’s hoarse reply: “I won’t.”

9. “Claire… that name suits you.”

After that day—maybe because Oliver had spoken to Adrian—my hands and feet were no longer shackled.

I seemed to have been moved to another room, like a sleeping chamber, with a tolerable temperature and soft bedding.

Still, the floor beneath my feet was cold.

My body was weak. Losing my heart and my eyes, those three vital lotus seeds, had left me like a dry leaf about to fall.

At night when I closed my eyes to rest a burning presence sat close by. Someone’s gaze would trace my face over and over with greedy attention.

I knew it was Oliver.

In truth, since the day I woke, besides Adrian—who claimed to have been my old Master—and Oliver, I hadn’t sensed anyone else.

Oliver hated letting me go. He clung to me tighter and tighter.

Sometimes, at my request, he would accompany me when I left. I never knew where we went, but being anywhere but that cell loosened some of the ache in my weary body.

One afternoon I leaned against a railing. Oliver stood beside me, handing over something that looked like bait.

“Sis, do you remember? When I was little I loved using these to feed the fish in the pond. Down below they call it fish bait.”

He held my hand and placed the bait in my palm.

I pulled my hand back and pinched a bit of it between my fingers, feeling the rough texture. “I’m sorry, I don’t remember.”

“…”

He was silent for a bit, then let out something like a laugh. “It’s okay, Sis. Oliver remembers. I’ll tell you everything.”

I nodded half-heartedly and turned to toss the bait into the pond, one piece at a time.

Ripples whispered out. Oliver stood quietly, his burning eyes tracing the lines of my face as if sketching them stroke by stroke.

Then a voice—like the last time—came from him, heard at a distance. “Divine Lord, it’s me—Hazel. If you hear this, could you come meet me?”

Hazel.

I raised an eyebrow.

Before Oliver could answer the voice spoke again. “Senior says I woke up thanks to what the Divine Lord brought—”

Oliver cut it off sharply.

“That voice sounds familiar,” I said, tossing another bit of bait. “Hazel. Nice name.”

Oliver’s smile looked strained. “She’s an old acquaintance, Sis. Let’s go back.”

I picked at the bait lazily. “You go on. I’ll stay a while.”

“But Sister—”

Panic threaded his voice.

“If you’re worried, make a ward.”

Oliver hesitated, then: “Sis, that’s not how I feel.”

When I didn’t respond he only said softly, “Then I’ll go first. Stay here… don’t wander off.”

In the moment he vanished I felt a ward fall into place.

I smiled faintly and tossed the rest of the bait into the pond.

Splash.

Quiet folded back over the garden.

Some unseen breeze brushed across my face. I felt something fall and tremble on my eyelids. Light as a breath.

I moved my eyes and the thing fluttered down to the tip of my nose.

I reached up and touched it. It was a butterfly.

It didn’t fear my touch. Its wings were soft and pure; under my palm they fluttered.

A tiny life vibrating.

“It tickles.”

The butterfly seemed to understand. It fluttered then perched on my outstretched finger.

I bowed my head. Darkness still pressed behind my eyes, but I could somehow picture the butterfly—delicate, gentle.

I paused, letting myself smile. Whether the butterfly understood or not, I murmured, “Back in Ravenmoor Marsh, spirits hated approaching me, even when I took my true form. This is Aetheria—do the spirits here like me more?”

The butterfly shifted on my fingertip.

For a breath I thought I could see it—a glow of light.

Then footsteps sounded nearby. The weight on my hand was gone.

The butterfly had flown away.

The presence that arrived wasn’t Oliver’s. It reminded me of the soft, cold kindness I’d felt the day I first woke.

Perhaps for some people, gentleness and distance weren’t opposites.

“You’re Adrian?”

I pulled my hand back and flicked my sleeve, turning to look toward the sound.

He stopped several paces away. His voice, pale and like mountain stream water, drifted to me. “Dominic said you lost your memory.”

The voice was familiar and pleasant, but it didn’t appeal to me.

“Dominic?” I said thoughtfully. “You mean Oliver? Isn’t that his name?”

“Oliver is the name you gave him.”

He said slowly, “Claire—have you truly lost your memory?”

I turned back to the pond, unruffled. “I haven’t lost everything.”

He took a step closer as if to press me, but I added, levelly: “Maybe I only forgot what I wanted to forget. Maybe those memories aren’t good for me. You—Oliver—Dominic? I don’t need them.”

“I am your Master,” Adrian said. His voice had a strange note I couldn’t place.

I rested a hand on the hollow where my missing heart had been. “Claire… I had no name back when I was in Ravenmoor Marsh. Did you give me this name too?”

I said the name slowly and smiled. “It suits me well.”

He didn’t step forward. He studied me from a distance. “How have you been lately?”

Adrian thought, without regret, of the decision he’d made.

Hazel had been the first apprentice who came to him willingly.

Back then the frail girl had bowed before him and pleaded in a sweet voice: “I submit to you as my Master, Divine Lord. Please grant me a name.”

He saw her true form at a glance — she was a moonlit lotus.

The girl was prettily composed and gentle; her eyes were pure. To look at her was to think she had never known suffering.

He looked at the girl and said softly, "Hazel, the lotus is your true form; it nurtures spirit and grace. From now on, you shall be called Hazel."

10. "You can’t even see your own heart, can you?"

Hazel was like the moon: tender, considerate, quietly able to sink into people’s hearts.

But Claire was different.

When she looked at others there was always wariness. Even when she smiled faintly, she made people feel distant.

Rescuing Claire from Ravenmoor Marsh wasn’t the first time Adrian had met her.

He brought the unnamed girl to Aetheria and gave her the name "Claire."

Claire had thought about it, then offered a small smile. "Claire, Claire — it suits me."

Which part of it suited her so perfectly?

Adrian didn’t ask, and Claire didn’t say.

Until the day Hazel would wake, Adrian was jolted awake from nightmares; his chest ached.

Hazel might wake, but most likely she’d be disoriented. Without a similar power to anchor her, she couldn’t safely take human form again and return to the Aether Lord’s seat.

So Marcus said beside him, "Master Rowan, didn’t you save Claire back then for precisely this day?"

Adrian thought: yes. He had saved Claire from Ravenmoor Marsh for Hazel, so that a hundred years later Hazel could return flawlessly as an Aether Lord.

A voice in his head said, "Claire is also your disciple."

But another voice retorted, "And what about Hazel? What about Hazel? Don’t forget — you rescued Claire for Hazel. Now that the time is right, Claire should repay over three hundred years of master-disciple debt."

Adrian slowly lifted his head from the couch. He looked at Marcus, who seemed impatient, and at Evan, whose expression held concern. He pressed his aching temple and said, "I’ll seal the way to the lower realm. Claire may well have reservations about you two. Go find Dominic and pluck out his heart yourself."

His hand trembled, then he added slowly, "Just the heart."

Without a heart, you can still live.

Hazel could awaken, and Claire could live.

His two little disciples… the voice that had first risen in his mind now sounded cold, a sarcastic edge: "Adrian, you haven’t seen your own heart."

I turned my head slightly. "Are you asking about my body?"

Even saying it felt absurd. The wind that met my face was cold, and my smile faded.

"Adrian, you pried my heart out, you stole my eyes—do you think I’ll be all right?"

Those words detonated like thunder by Adrian’s ear.

He frowned. The gentle expression he usually wore was gone. Adrian moved forward quickly and grabbed my arm, like an accusation. "Pried out your heart? Stole your eyes?"

His grip was tight.

I looked at him, at the one who might, in the dark, actually see — but unsurprisingly, I saw nothing.

I let out a soft hum and smiled. "Isn’t that what the one you call Dominic said?"

Before Adrian could answer, a flare of fire rose between us — Dominic was back.

Dominic.

The name conjured an Aether Lord of spring and flame, famed and dazzling.

What of him now?

I tried to pull my arm free from Adrian, but Adrian waved his sleeve and the fire vanished.

The next second Dominic had already seized my other arm. He gripped harder than Adrian; his fingers seemed to bite into my flesh.

I frowned and said, "Let go. Both of you."

Dominic held on tighter, voice laced with obvious tension, "Sister, did he say anything to you? Don’t you believe him."

"You mean about you calling yourself Dominic?"

I said lightly. "Aren’t you Dominic?"

Dominic’s fingers trembled. He was silent a long beat, then said, "I’m Oliver."

"Sister, I’m Oliver."

He murmured the name again as if to himself.

Adrian looked at him with cool disdain.

This Divine Lord, usually composed and unassailable, now wore a mocking smile. "Dominic, have you forgotten what you did with your own hands? Or do you need me to repeat it?"

"Shut up!"

Dominic’s hand grew hot, like it was devouring my skin with flame, and he yelled in something close to delirium.

The sky rumbled with the roar of a dragon chariot — Dominic’s mount.

Dominic’s eyes were slowly reddening. He stared at Adrian, who seemed untouched by worldly dust, and laughed—once, twice. "Adrian, what about you? Whose orders were those? Don’t you know in your own heart?"

He paused, as if realizing something, then drew out the words with bitter sarcasm: "Or is it, Adrian… that you can’t even see your own heart?"

11. "She looks very ill."

I could feel the dead silence thick around us.

Adrian didn’t answer Dominic, and Dominic didn’t speak further. They both held my arms as if to measure who had the upper hand.

Footsteps approached, like something chasing, and stopped not far away.

"Dominic? Adrian Lord, um—Master Rowan?"

A woman’s anxious but tender voice made Adrian’s fingers relax a little.

"Master Rowan, why are you here with Dominic…"

Her voice faltered.

It sounded like a startled fawn—tingly and soft, yet somehow comforting.

I knew that voice at once — Hazel, the woman who had carried messages for Dominic many times.

Two more footsteps came after her.

A new voice, sharp with surprise and a hint of guilty bewilderment, said, "…Claire?"

Adrian finally let go completely.

His tone was cold. "What are you two doing here?"

I’d never heard Adrian speak so coldly.

Hazel froze.

When she woke, the first person she saw was Adrian. He was gentle, strong, patient. He sometimes stared off suddenly, but when he looked at her his gaze was focused and calm.

Beside Adrian Hazel felt unprecedented security. So when Adrian told her that the past Claire had been his disciple, Hazel was delighted; some unnameable feeling swelled within her.

He had never spoken to her this coldly before.

This was the first time.

A flicker of panic rose in Hazel’s chest.

She saw the person Adrian had just grabbed — someone who looked very much like her.

But it was clear this woman, similar as she was, couldn’t see; the three parts that differed almost overwhelmed the seven parts that matched.

Her expression was faint, her face pale. In that instant, a figure flashed through Hazel’s mind, but a name quickly eclipsed it.

"Claire."

The name rose in Hazel’s heart.

"Claire Aether Lord," attendants had said; Marcus and others had called her "little junior sister Claire" when arguing. Dominic often disappeared to see someone, and Adrian would freeze when he heard the name.

Standing beside Hazel, staring blankly at Claire, was Evan.

"She looks very ill." — Only that thought crossed Evan’s mind.

He glanced at Hazel with a complicated expression, then looked at Claire and lowered his head.

"I was going to thank Dominic, but the Divine Lord seemed to have urgent business…"

Hazel looked anxiously at Dominic and turned to Adrian to explain.

What she saw next was a scene.

Adrian stared at her without answering, then turned to Dominic and said coolly, "Dominic, will you release her? Claire’s body is frail…"

Dominic cut him off with a cold laugh. "What kind of release do you mean? Whichever you mean—I won’t."

"I don’t want to be held by you. Let go."

Feeling my arm burning, I said, "Dominic, let go."

"…"

I couldn’t see Dominic’s face, but after a long silence his hand tightened once, then slowly unclenched.

"Claire, have you truly lost your memory?"

Another voice, unlike the others, spoke slowly.

I looked toward where the voice came from and couldn’t help a mocking smile. "Why don’t you ask whether I still have a heart, or whether I still have eyes?"

Premium chapters locked

Unlock the rest of the story

200 Book Coins

The next scene of I Was the White Lotus Stand-In begins with: I went on slowly, "I don’t know who you are, but hearing your voice makes me a bit sick. Politeness would demand I ask your name, but I’d rather not soil my ears with it — so I… Continue with the remaining 1184 story sections.

Get Book Coins to Unlock